3rd August 2026 | Beverly Landais
We often spend so much time managing transitions at work that we forget our personal lives have their own distinct seasons. Whether it is adjusting to an empty nest, navigating a milestone birthday, or simply feeling that a familiar chapter is closing, personal change can feel deeply unsettling. We may not be able to control when these shifts arrive, but we do have a choice in how we navigate them.
The Three Phases of Transition
Navigating personal change is rarely a simple leap from the old to the new. It is helpful to view these shifts through the lens of William Bridges' transition model, which outlines three distinct phases:
- Phase 1: The Ending. Every new beginning starts with an ending. This phase is where we must acknowledge what is being lost, such as a routine or a sense of certainty. Honouring the past is a critical first step to embracing the future.
- Phase 2: The Neutral Zone. This is the messy, uncomfortable 'in-between' stage. The old way is gone, but the new one is not fully formed. While confusing, this space is the fertile ground where creativity, reflection, and reorientation happen.
- Phase 3: The New Beginning. Finally, we start to step into the new reality with fresh focus. Our attention naturally shifts from what was lost to the possibilities of what has been gained.
Balancing the Negativity Bias
When we find ourselves in the uncomfortable 'Neutral Zone', our human negativity bias naturally kicks in, understandably making us focus on risks and worries. Positive psychology teaches us that we can gently balance this by deliberately noticing positive emotions. Research shows that experiencing more positive emotions than negative ones helps us reach a point where we naturally build resilience.
You can encourage this through small, everyday steps. Take a moment to pause and appreciate your environment, thank someone for the value they add to your life, or lift your mood by listening to a favourite piece of music. Even simple actions like stepping outside for fresh air, noticing something beautiful around you, or writing down one thing you're grateful for can help shift your mindset in a positive direction. The key is to be intentional in whatever you choose to do, so that each small action becomes a meaningful part of your day rather than something you do on autopilot.
The Value of Connection
A key part of moving from one phase of life to another is building connections with other people. When I left my corporate career a decade ago to set up my coaching practice, the shift was noticeable. I quickly realised how much I missed the daily camaraderie of being part of a team and working towards shared goals.
To bridge that gap, I actively sought out other coaches through professional associations, social events and training opportunities to build a new network of mutual support and friendship. I also took up Tai Chi, which provided a focus for my wellbeing and introduced me to a wonderful new community outside of work.
When we leave jobs, relocate, or change our circumstances, we often lose touch with old colleagues and friends. While it is good to stay connected with those who offer healthy, supportive relationships, a life transition is also an opportunity to meet new people. Seek out groups built around shared interests. This might involve volunteering, joining a local club, singing in a choir, or simply meeting fellow dog walkers on your morning route.
Most importantly, do what feels right for you. For example, I still enjoy the many friendships I made during my corporate career, but I've also made new friends through my participation as a budding singer with RockChoir.
It is entirely normal to find change unsettling, and the prospect of meeting new people can certainly feel daunting. When you step into unfamiliar environments, try to maintain a sense of curiosity about those you meet. Being open to new perspectives and allowing yourself just to be present in the moment can remove the heavy pressure of having to fit in immediately.
Crucially, make these connections in the real world. While digital networks are convenient, we are fundamentally wired for physical presence. Spending time with others in person offers a level of satisfaction and authentic support that cannot be replicated online alone.
Practising Self-Awareness
Managing a transition requires self-awareness. This means noticing your thoughts and feelings without becoming attached or overly critical of them. When you feel low or uncertain, your inner critic can be quite harsh.
Instead of listening to that negative narrative, practise self-compassion. Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer a friend experiencing difficult emotions. Quiet your inner critic by tuning into the sensible, reassuring voice of your inner mentor, and ask yourself what practical, caring advice they would provide.
Focusing on What Matters
When everything feels up in the air, focus your energy on what you can control. Spend some time reflecting upon what truly matters to you and what makes you feel fulfilled. A practical, grounding way to gain clarity is to create three simple lists headed Stop, Start, and Continue, and then order those items by priority.
Once your priorities are clear, build a realistic action plan. Start with a positive statement of intent, focus on the sensible steps between where you are now and your destination, and lean on the trusted networks you have around you.
Transitions are a very natural part of the human experience. By bringing compassionate awareness to our feelings, connecting authentically with others, and consciously choosing our response, we can step into our new beginnings with clear, calm intention.
What personal transition are you currently navigating, and what is one small choice you can make today to embrace it?
3rd August 2026 | Beverly Landais
